here
is another aspect of my self perception of my state of being that is illustrated
graphically below. Some years ago, I stepped out of the solidity of normal
being in the world into a reality that provides support while not being
directly and normally perceptible. My present view of reality does not
in my opinion have all of the contradictions of the more normal ones of
human society. A knight in armor was chosen as an image because while
protection is provided, vigilance is required, but normally not aggression;
note the drawn sword but not an attacking stance. The link to the imagery
of the Leap of Faith of the Grail Legends is also deliberate. Another
reason for the choice is that the armor provides external form, including
the helmet, as there appears to be nothing inside
but a point of perception.

I have already discussed
this briefly as the loss of my internal dialogue
and these are all slightly different viewpoints on and descriptions of
my self perception or lack therof. Ultimately, there
is no I, no doer; only a perceiver and everything just happens. Open
your mouth and words fall out. Be in a situation and actions occur. There
are goals and plans, but no compulsion to accomplish them. Things seem
to happen by themselves. I am not apart from the continuum
of being which I perceive around me. Not
the center, the cause or the doer but part of the flow of Ultimate Reality.
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